Two Stars And A Wish! â­ï¸â­ï¸ðŸŒ 

Two stars:

Stars are things I’ve done well or enjoyed etc, and a wish is something I want to achieve by next week.

⭐️ 1. I’ve managed to stay (mostly) calm and not self harmed with the situation surrounding my father.

⭐️ 2. My counsellor was proud of me for emailing my father, and said I’d been honest and it’s the most I’d opened up!

Last week’s wish was: “🌠To continue working on my scripts, and try to remain as calm and as positive as possible.”

Have I achieved this? Kind of. I’ve been struggling to come up with ideas for my scripts, but am still writing when I can!

I’ve had many moments this week where I haven’t remained calm or positive, but I have tried!

I guess my long term wish is still:🌠 To find a job.

This week’s wish is: “To try to come up with more ideas for my scripts, and try to remain positive whenever I can.

What are your two stars and a wish? Let me know in the comments below!

-MW❤️

Advertisements

Two Stars And A Wish! â­ï¸â­ï¸ðŸŒ 

Two stars:

Stars are things I’ve done well or enjoyed etc, and a wish is something I want to achieve by next week.

⭐️ 1. I looked after my sister when she was ill.

⭐️ 2. I had many difficult moments, but DIDN’T SELF HARM! 😁

Last week’s wish was: “🌠To continue working hard on my scripts, and continue to keep calm when times get rough.”

Have I achieved this? Partly. I have worked hard on my scripts, though have reached a stand still and unsure how to go on from here!

I have tried to keep calm mostly but not always succeeded.

I guess my long term wish is still:🌠 To find a job.

This week’s wish is: “To work out how to finish my scripts etc, and to keep positive and calm as often as possible.

What are your two stars and a wish? Let me know in the comments below!

– MW❤️

Two Stars And A Wish! â­ï¸â­ï¸ðŸŒ 

Two stars:

Stars are things I’ve done well or enjoyed etc, and a wish is something I want to achieve by next week.

⭐️ 1. I continued to work hard and finished the next episode of my scripts!This is great, but I need to keep up this hard work!!

⭐️ 2. I had many difficult moments, but DIDN’T SELF HARM! 😁

Last week’s wish was: “🌠To talk to my counsellor and find a way to send a script to the contact via email. (Doesn’t have to be this week necessarily.)

To try to keep calm and not pressure myself when feeling low. But keep positive!

To push myself to work hard (or harder!) on my scripts!

Have I achieved this? Partly. I didn’t talk to my counsellor about sending the script to the contact, but will try to find the courage to next time. I have tried to keep calm and not pressure myself when I’m feeling down. I’ve not been working as hard as I should have been on my scripts, but I’ve just finished the next episode, so I’ve got to keep up the hard work!

I guess my long term wish is still:🌠 To find a job.

This week’s wish is: “🌠To continue working hard on my scripts, and continue to keep calm when times get rough.”

What are your two stars and a wish? Let me know in the comments below!

– MW❤️

Two Stars And A Wish! â­ï¸â­ï¸ðŸŒ 

Two stars:

Stars are things I’ve done well or enjoyed etc, and a wish is something I want to achieve by next week.

⭐️ 1. I replied to a contact about my future career! I’d emailed the course leader I went on asking for tips on my future. Gotta take a big step and share my script with him. HOW? 😭😱

⭐️ 2. I had many difficult moments and very low mood, but DIDN’T SELF HARM- Resisted the urges and didn’t give in!! 😁

Last week’s wish was: “🌠To research more with my sister about LinkedIn, future, contacts etc. To spend more time with family; games, cinema, or whatever activity is suitable.

Have I achieved this? Not exactly. I have replied to the email about my future, but not much research etc. Today was my grandad’s birthday so our family spent some time together. But have equally had some rough moments with family too. :/

I guess my long term wish is still:🌠 To find a job.

This week’s wish is: “🌠To talk to my counsellor and find a way to send a script to the contact via email. (Doesn’t have to be this week necessarily.)

To try to keep calm and not pressure myself when feeling low. But keep positive!

To push myself to work hard (or harder!) on my scripts!

What are your two stars and a wish? Let me know in the comments below!

– MW❤️

Two Stars And A Wish! â­ï¸â­ï¸ðŸŒ 

Two stars:

Stars are things I’ve done well or enjoyed etc, and a wish is something I want to achieve by next week.

⭐️ 1. I’m still clean from self harm! Last night my family was arguing etc and I wanted to self harm but didn’t. 🙂

⭐️ 2. I’ve tried to start researching about my future – Continued to write my scripts. If anyone knows how to get into the industry I’d appreciate any tips! Everything is in London and you have to have an agent or manager and I have neither. :/

Last week’s wish was: “🌠To discuss plans for future with my sister (even if it’s later on in the week when she’s free), meanwhile start planning on my own!

Have I achieved this? Not quite. She hasn’t been free, so today I research briefly about my future, though I need to do more.

I guess my long term wish is still:🌠 To find a job.

This week’s wish is: “🌠To continue researching about my future, and try to be more positive, show gratitude, and be calmer.

What are your two stars and a wish? Let me know in the comments below!

– MW❤️

Mental Health Awareness Week

I’ve finished Girl Online by Zoe Sugg (check it out!) and it’s amazing!
Zoe posted on Instagram her story of anxiety for Mental Health awareness week. She’s so inspirational! 💗

Feel free to share your story of mental health in the comments below. We’re not here to judge; we’re here to support each other. NO ONE IS ALONE. 💖

My story:

In brief terms, I suffer from depression, self harm and anxiety, maybe more too.

I’ve had depression and anxiety since 2013, I don’t really know how or why it started. The anxiety was serious in 2015 with panic attacks, but they went away! I’m not sure how or when exactly. But they came back and are now worse than ever! 😦 But I’ve been praying each night (I’m a Christian). And that’s helped calm me a little bit. Repeating words of prayer as a mantra to calm myself. 

If you’re not a Christian, that okay. But I found repeating words of comfort to myself helps. And Zoe Sugg’s book said to tell yourself: It’s okay to be anxious. Tell yourself it’s okay; don’t fight it. Imagine it, picture it. It helps me 🙂

My depression continued to get worse. 2014 one of my best friends left our friendship group. But I stayed and grew even closer to this other girl in the group. Let’s call her P. From about 2011 onwards, we were inseparable.

… Until 2015. We just stopped talking one day. I mean our friendship had been going downhill for a few months now I look back.

To cut this short, after not speaking for months, we actually made friends again a few months later. But she now has a new best friend and they’re so close and I can’t help but say it breaks my heart. Her new best friend is nice and I don’t hate her or anything. But I wish I could still be best friends with P. I message her sometimes; snapchat message or Facebook. It’s better than nothing, but to me, it’s often upsetting and pointless. But she does reply. But then I see her tagging this other best friend and other girls and they put kisses to each other and I feel so sad. 😦

But I had this guy. (As a friend, but he said he fancied me.) HE decided to hang out with me. HE chose to be my friend. But he left. Messaged me one morning before school saying he didn’t want to be my friend anymore; just like that. And that was the end of my new friendship.

I finally had the guts a few months later to meet him and ask him what had happened. He didn’t feel guilty at all! That’s why I said the following, so yes I shouldn’t have said this and guilt tripped him or whatever. But he didn’t feel guilty anyway!

I told him I’d started self harming because of him. I told him I was ending my life in three day because of him. (I wasn’t joking. I was in such a low place).

He didn’t care. He basically said nothing. It felt like he told me to go kill myself and it broke my heart. He told me he loved me and his goal was to make me happy! How can that be true if he one day just ups and leaves me all alone?! I said don’t you feel guilty?! And he said, no not really. Maybe a bit. URGH.

I still message some of my “friends” from high school. But I have no one.

If you’ve read this far, thank you. I’m so nervous for sharing my story. There’s more secrets I’ve yet to share, but when the time is ready.

If anyone wants to talk I’m here.

So, let’s fight our way through this misty fog… Until my next blog!

– M